Scene 5: Geneforge Forum
Scene 5: Geneforge Forum DikiyobaThe battle still rages and the rain still falls in the Geneforge Forum. The outlook looks poor for the forty or so Spiderwebbers still fighting a few hundred noobs. The noobs have pushed the Spiderwebbers away from the pools and from the pillar. Several noobs attack the pillar until it crumbles. Lazarus wipes rainwater out of his eyes.
Lazarus: We can't keep this up much longer. When do you think the mods will call the retreat?
Kingy shrugs and fires his thorn baton.
Kingy: As long as there are spare thorns left, I guess.
FBM: I don't think there are any thorns left.
Lazarus: Oh great. Well, this is useless now.
Lazarus tosses aside his thorn baton and picks up a stick. He begins wacking the noobs with the stick. Delicious Vlish casts terror on more noobs and then turns at a noise. He sees three figures enter the forum. Slartucker and Arancaytar are chasing Spawner and yelling for help. Delicious Vlish casts terror on more noobs and then hurries over to help Slartucker and Arancaytar. Spawner ducks as Slartucker shoots another thorn at it.
Spawner: Ha! That's six thorns! You're out of ammo now!
Spawner halts and draws the shaped blade. Slartucker reaches for more thorns, only to discover that he is out. As Spawner advances on them, Delicious Vlish approaches. He slaps Spawner across the face with a tentacle. Spawner falls to the ground, dead. Arancaytar picks up the shaped blade.
Slartucker: Thanks, Vlish. How is the battle going?
Delicious Vlish: Badly.
Delicious Vlish, Arancaytar, and Slartucker run back and rejoin the battle.
Khoth: We're being overwhelmed, Vlish. Do we call the retreat?
Delicious Vlish: No. We'll only be in the same position in the Avernum 4 Forum that we are in now if we retreat with the noobs on us.
There is a horrible cry from Archmage Alex as he is brought down by several noobs. Dikiyoba tries to fight towards him, but is cut off by all the noobs.
Archmage Alex: One cold night, you shall regret the disrepect you have shown me, noobs. In the meantime, I shall dream of nachos and shrunken pheasants.
Archmage Alex dies. Wonko the Sane finds himself cut off from the rest of the Spiderwebbers. He casts daze on the group of noobs blocking his path and runs back towards the Spiderwebbers. Unfortunately, he slips and falls in the mud. Five noobs jump on him before he can rise and quickly kill him.
The Almighty Do-er of Stuff: What do we do now? We've just lost two more members.
Delicious Vlish casts terror again. Suddenly, a noob sinks its teeth into one of Delicious Vlish's tentacles. Delicious Vlish shrieks in pain and anger and throws the noob off. However, many of the other noobs see how effective it was and bite Delicious Vlish as hard as they can. Delicious Vlish shrieks again, infuriated. It sends a blast of mental energy through everyone nearby. Noobs and Spiderwebbers fall back, stunned. With a howl, Delicious Vlish hurls himself into the noob army, tentacles flailing everywhere.
Delicious Vlish: Silly noobs! I'll kill you all! I'll kill you all!
Arancaytar: Wait! What are you doing, Vlish?
Saunders: I think he's gone rogue.
Khoth: This is our chance to retreat. The noobs have fallen back for the moment.
Slartucker: But Delicious Vlish will die if he doesn't get out of there soon. Look, he's already been injured twice more.
Kelandon: Delicious Vlish! Get out of their!
Delicious Vlish throws himself further into the noob army. He shrieks again and slaps noobs left and right.
Slartucker: He's completely out of control!
Khoth: Retreat! Retreat! Retreat to the Avernum 4 Forum!
The Spiderwebbers turn and run while the noobs are occupied with trying to bring down Delicious Vlish. Soon, everyone has exited except for Ephesos, Dikiyoba, and Slartucker.
Ephesos: I can't leave while he's still alive.
Slartucker: Neither can I. Delicious Vlish! Retreat! Delicious Vlish!
Dikiyoba: Dikiyoba doesn't think that he can hear you, Slartucker.
Slartucker: I know. But we can't run in and pull him out. There's just too many noobs. Can't you heal him or cast unshackle mind on him, Ephesos?
Ephesos: No, he's out of range. And there's no way for me to get closer without having the noobs attack me.
Delicious Vlish disappears suddenly under a group of noobs. Delicious Vlish gives a final cry that the three remaining Spiderwebbers think rather than hear. Delicious Vlish dies. Ephesos, Dikiyoba, and Slartucker exit as the noobs surge forward. The ur-noob enters unexpectedly, leading the remaining undead newbs and all the undead lurkers.
Ur-noob: HALT!
The noobs falter and stop.
Ur-noob: WHERE IS SPAWNER?
None of the noobs answer. The ur-noob looks around until it sees Spawner's body.
Ur-noob: DEAD! VERY WELL! I'LL LEAD THE NEXT ATTACK MYSELF! NOOBS, YOU CLEAN UP THIS FORUM! THE UNDEAD WILL COME WITH ME!
The ur-noob pauses to eat the body of Delicious Vlish.
Ur-noob: VERY TASTY INDEED! THESE SPIDERWEBBERS DO HAVE THEIR USES! MUWAHAHAHA!
Laughing madly, the ur-noob exits at the head of the undead army into the Averum 4 Forum.
Lazarus: We can't keep this up much longer. When do you think the mods will call the retreat?
Kingy shrugs and fires his thorn baton.
Kingy: As long as there are spare thorns left, I guess.
FBM: I don't think there are any thorns left.
Lazarus: Oh great. Well, this is useless now.
Lazarus tosses aside his thorn baton and picks up a stick. He begins wacking the noobs with the stick. Delicious Vlish casts terror on more noobs and then turns at a noise. He sees three figures enter the forum. Slartucker and Arancaytar are chasing Spawner and yelling for help. Delicious Vlish casts terror on more noobs and then hurries over to help Slartucker and Arancaytar. Spawner ducks as Slartucker shoots another thorn at it.
Spawner: Ha! That's six thorns! You're out of ammo now!
Spawner halts and draws the shaped blade. Slartucker reaches for more thorns, only to discover that he is out. As Spawner advances on them, Delicious Vlish approaches. He slaps Spawner across the face with a tentacle. Spawner falls to the ground, dead. Arancaytar picks up the shaped blade.
Slartucker: Thanks, Vlish. How is the battle going?
Delicious Vlish: Badly.
Delicious Vlish, Arancaytar, and Slartucker run back and rejoin the battle.
Khoth: We're being overwhelmed, Vlish. Do we call the retreat?
Delicious Vlish: No. We'll only be in the same position in the Avernum 4 Forum that we are in now if we retreat with the noobs on us.
There is a horrible cry from Archmage Alex as he is brought down by several noobs. Dikiyoba tries to fight towards him, but is cut off by all the noobs.
Archmage Alex: One cold night, you shall regret the disrepect you have shown me, noobs. In the meantime, I shall dream of nachos and shrunken pheasants.
Archmage Alex dies. Wonko the Sane finds himself cut off from the rest of the Spiderwebbers. He casts daze on the group of noobs blocking his path and runs back towards the Spiderwebbers. Unfortunately, he slips and falls in the mud. Five noobs jump on him before he can rise and quickly kill him.
The Almighty Do-er of Stuff: What do we do now? We've just lost two more members.
Delicious Vlish casts terror again. Suddenly, a noob sinks its teeth into one of Delicious Vlish's tentacles. Delicious Vlish shrieks in pain and anger and throws the noob off. However, many of the other noobs see how effective it was and bite Delicious Vlish as hard as they can. Delicious Vlish shrieks again, infuriated. It sends a blast of mental energy through everyone nearby. Noobs and Spiderwebbers fall back, stunned. With a howl, Delicious Vlish hurls himself into the noob army, tentacles flailing everywhere.
Delicious Vlish: Silly noobs! I'll kill you all! I'll kill you all!
Arancaytar: Wait! What are you doing, Vlish?
Saunders: I think he's gone rogue.
Khoth: This is our chance to retreat. The noobs have fallen back for the moment.
Slartucker: But Delicious Vlish will die if he doesn't get out of there soon. Look, he's already been injured twice more.
Kelandon: Delicious Vlish! Get out of their!
Delicious Vlish throws himself further into the noob army. He shrieks again and slaps noobs left and right.
Slartucker: He's completely out of control!
Khoth: Retreat! Retreat! Retreat to the Avernum 4 Forum!
The Spiderwebbers turn and run while the noobs are occupied with trying to bring down Delicious Vlish. Soon, everyone has exited except for Ephesos, Dikiyoba, and Slartucker.
Ephesos: I can't leave while he's still alive.
Slartucker: Neither can I. Delicious Vlish! Retreat! Delicious Vlish!
Dikiyoba: Dikiyoba doesn't think that he can hear you, Slartucker.
Slartucker: I know. But we can't run in and pull him out. There's just too many noobs. Can't you heal him or cast unshackle mind on him, Ephesos?
Ephesos: No, he's out of range. And there's no way for me to get closer without having the noobs attack me.
Delicious Vlish disappears suddenly under a group of noobs. Delicious Vlish gives a final cry that the three remaining Spiderwebbers think rather than hear. Delicious Vlish dies. Ephesos, Dikiyoba, and Slartucker exit as the noobs surge forward. The ur-noob enters unexpectedly, leading the remaining undead newbs and all the undead lurkers.
Ur-noob: HALT!
The noobs falter and stop.
Ur-noob: WHERE IS SPAWNER?
None of the noobs answer. The ur-noob looks around until it sees Spawner's body.
Ur-noob: DEAD! VERY WELL! I'LL LEAD THE NEXT ATTACK MYSELF! NOOBS, YOU CLEAN UP THIS FORUM! THE UNDEAD WILL COME WITH ME!
The ur-noob pauses to eat the body of Delicious Vlish.
Ur-noob: VERY TASTY INDEED! THESE SPIDERWEBBERS DO HAVE THEIR USES! MUWAHAHAHA!
Laughing madly, the ur-noob exits at the head of the undead army into the Averum 4 Forum.