Scene 3: Avernum 4 Forum
Scene 3: Avernum 4 Forum DikiyobaThe GIFTS' voice echos through the cave and into the passages beyond.
Slartucker: Great! Now we're all going to die!
Arancaytar and Slartucker ready their bows. However, the undead seem confused by the echos and haven't found the cave entrance yet.
GIFTS: We're not going to die, silly!
Arancaytar fires at the first undead to discover the cave.
Arancaytar: How do you think will we escape?
GIFTS: There's a secret passage, silly! Follow me!
There is a scrabbling noise as the GIFTS runs over to the far corner of the cave and disappears. Slartucker and Arancaytar fire again. Dikiyoba drags Ephesos over to the corner of the cave and looks around.
Dikiyoba: Dikiyoba thinks this secret passage is very small. Dikiyoba will have to crawl through it.
Slartucker: Hurry up and do so!
Slartucker shoots another undead. Dikiyoba crawls through a small, very short tunnel that opens into a much larger cave. Then Dikiyoba pulls Ephesos through. Arancaytar and Slartucker fire again. Arancaytar ducks into the secret tunnel. Slartucker fires again and crawls into the tunnel as well. He is about halfway into the large cave when undead claws grab his leg and start to pull him back.
Slartucker: No!
Dikiyoba grabs Slartucker's wrists and pulls back. Slartucker kicks at the undead grabbing him until another undead grabs into his other foot. Slartucker is pulled further back into the tunnel. Arancaytar grabs Slartucker as well. Slartucker panics.
Slartucker: Don't let me go!
In the small cave, a third undead grabs Slartucker's feet. It lets go as it is enveloped in sticky, suffocating webbing. The other two undead grabbing Slartucker suffer similar fates. In the large cave, Arancaytar and Dikiyoba pull Slartucker to safety. After a moment, he regains some of his composure.
Slartucker: Thanks for saving me. Now wake Ephesos up somehow. Look at what the undead claws did to me!
Arancaytar pulls out his bow and shoots an undead crawling through the tunnel. The GIFTS crawls back in through a secret passage near the ceiling and drops to the ground. In the slightly brighter light of the lair, the GIFTS is revealed to be only knee-high. It looks at Slartucker.
GIFTS: Hi! You're cute!
Slartucker: Will you just shut up?
The GIFTS thinks for a moment.
GIFTS: Did you know that you're cute?
Slartucker: Gah!
Arancaytar: Could I get some help here?
Arancaytar shoots another undead attempting to get in.
GIFTS: Of course, silly!
The GIFTS runs over to the passage and sprays a wad of impenetrable, gooey web over the entrance. Arancaytar puts away his bow.
Arancaytar: That's a relief.
GIFTS: You're so cute!
Dikiyoba reaches into Dikiyoba's inventory and pulls out a potion. Dikiyoba hands it to Slartucker.
Dikiyoba: This is Dikiyoba's last potion.
The GIFTS runs over.
GIFTS: You're cute!
Dikiyoba looks annoyed, but not nearly as annoyed as Slartucker.
Slartucker: This had better be a poison potion so that I don't have to put up with the GIFTS any longer.
Dikiyoba: No, it's a healing potion. At least Dikiyoba thinks it is a healing potion.
Slartucker drinks the healing potion. His cuts heal. Suddenly, Ephesos groans and sits up.
Ephesos: What's going on? Where am I?
GIFTS: Hi! You're cute!
Ephesos: Oh no! Are you what I think you are?
GIFTS: I am a Giant Intelligent Friendly Talking Spider! My name is Spider! Say, did you know that you are cute?
Ephesos: Somehow, I expected GIFTS to be somewhat larger.
GIFTS: We look larger in the games than we really are, silly.
Arancaytar: Now what do we do?
GIFTS: Are you looking for a mate? Because I am.
Arancaytar: You stay away from me.
Slartucker: Is there any other way out of this cave?
GIFTS: Sure! Follow me!
The GIFTS starts to scuttle through the cave. Slartucker, Arancaytar, Dikiyoba, and Ephesos follow. Suddenly, another GIFTS drops down from the ceiling.
GIFTS: You're cute!
Other GIFTS come out and surround the four Spiderwebbers. There must be close to a hundred of them. They all start talking in high-pitched voices. Slartucker covers his ears.
Slartucker: We're stuck in a cave with GIFTS. Could it get any worse?
On the main level, the ur-noob finally manages to pull its hand free. It looks at the passage below but sees nothing but undead below.
Ur-noob: UNDEAD! WHERE IS HE?
The multitudes of undead below shrug as one.
Ur-noob: YOU MEAN YOU LET HIM ESCAPE? ARGH!
Then the ur-noob pauses. It hears something. It puts its head close to the ground and listens carefully. It can hear many high-pitched voices and occasionally the more normal tones of a Spiderwebber. The ur-noob grins wickedly. Then it starts stomping on the ground. In the GIFTS cave, Dikiyoba looks up as the cave starts to shake and rocks dislodge from the ceiling.
Dikiyoba: Dikiyoba has a bad feeling about this...
Arancaytar: What's going on?
Ephesos: A cave quake?
The GIFTS flee in terror. They all flee in one direction, however. The four Spiderwebbers dodge aside as a chunk of ceiling collapses.
Slartucker: What will we do?
Dikiyoba: Dikiyoba thinks we should follow the GIFTS.
Arancaytar: I hate to admit it, but it's probably the best option we have.
The four Spiderwebbers run after the GIFTS. The GIFTS are all climbing up a narrow, nearly vertical escape tunnel.
Ephesos: It looks very narrow.
Another huge piece of ceiling collapses.
Arancaytar: We'll fit.
Arancaytar starts climbing. Dikiyoba follows, and then Slartucker and Ephesos. Shortly afterward, the whole ceiling of the cave collapses. The ur-noob smiles even more broadly as it looks at the rubble.
Ur-noob: THAT SHOULD TAKE CARE OF THEM!
The ur-noob then turns its attention to the ceiling. Using its hands and its fiery breath, it forms a hole large enough for it to crawl through. The ur-noob pulls itself up into the upper level of the forum. Lazarus is watching the huge group of undead blocking the forum's exit. He whirls around and pulls out his sword as he hears someone approaching.
Lazarus: Wha... oh. It's you. Hello, Infernal.
Infernal666hate: It's good to see someone else still alive. Wait... is that Demonslayer?
Lazarus: Yeah. I took it off of Zeviz's body.
Infernal666hate raises her stick.
Infernal666hate: We need to get out of here. Now. Before we are killed as well. So, should we just run in and start killing the undead and hope we make it through?
Lazarus: I was actually thinking about pretending to be undead.
Somewhere behind them, the ur-noob shrieks. Lazarus and Infernal666hate panic and run straight into the undead. The undead immediately attack. Lazarus and Infernal666hate stab at the undead with their weapons. Infernal666hate finally falls to the ground.
Infernal666hate: Oh, hell.
Infernal666hate dies. Lazarus collapses and dies soon afterward. The undead continue to claw him though, just in case he isn't really dead. The ur-noob enters the cave.
Ur-noob: GOOD! MORE DEAD SPIDERWEBBERS!
The ur-noob eats both bodies and steps towards the exit. There is a sudden snapping sound. The ur-noob lifts its foot to reveal Demonslayer, broken into three pieces. The ur-noob shrugs and exits. All the undead follow. Arancaytar, Dikiyoba, Slartucker, and Ephesos are still crawling up the tunnel. Suddenly, Arancaytar winces.
Arancaytar: Infernal666hate and Lazarus just died.
Arancaytar misses his next step and slips. He slides backwards, only stopping when his foot finds support against Dikiyoba's head.
Dikiyoba: You're hurting Dikiyoba!
Arancaytar: Sorry.
Arancaytar regains his balance and continues to climb up. Occasionally, the four Spiderwebbers can hear a high-pitched echo from above them.
Slartucker: Great! Now we're all going to die!
Arancaytar and Slartucker ready their bows. However, the undead seem confused by the echos and haven't found the cave entrance yet.
GIFTS: We're not going to die, silly!
Arancaytar fires at the first undead to discover the cave.
Arancaytar: How do you think will we escape?
GIFTS: There's a secret passage, silly! Follow me!
There is a scrabbling noise as the GIFTS runs over to the far corner of the cave and disappears. Slartucker and Arancaytar fire again. Dikiyoba drags Ephesos over to the corner of the cave and looks around.
Dikiyoba: Dikiyoba thinks this secret passage is very small. Dikiyoba will have to crawl through it.
Slartucker: Hurry up and do so!
Slartucker shoots another undead. Dikiyoba crawls through a small, very short tunnel that opens into a much larger cave. Then Dikiyoba pulls Ephesos through. Arancaytar and Slartucker fire again. Arancaytar ducks into the secret tunnel. Slartucker fires again and crawls into the tunnel as well. He is about halfway into the large cave when undead claws grab his leg and start to pull him back.
Slartucker: No!
Dikiyoba grabs Slartucker's wrists and pulls back. Slartucker kicks at the undead grabbing him until another undead grabs into his other foot. Slartucker is pulled further back into the tunnel. Arancaytar grabs Slartucker as well. Slartucker panics.
Slartucker: Don't let me go!
In the small cave, a third undead grabs Slartucker's feet. It lets go as it is enveloped in sticky, suffocating webbing. The other two undead grabbing Slartucker suffer similar fates. In the large cave, Arancaytar and Dikiyoba pull Slartucker to safety. After a moment, he regains some of his composure.
Slartucker: Thanks for saving me. Now wake Ephesos up somehow. Look at what the undead claws did to me!
Arancaytar pulls out his bow and shoots an undead crawling through the tunnel. The GIFTS crawls back in through a secret passage near the ceiling and drops to the ground. In the slightly brighter light of the lair, the GIFTS is revealed to be only knee-high. It looks at Slartucker.
GIFTS: Hi! You're cute!
Slartucker: Will you just shut up?
The GIFTS thinks for a moment.
GIFTS: Did you know that you're cute?
Slartucker: Gah!
Arancaytar: Could I get some help here?
Arancaytar shoots another undead attempting to get in.
GIFTS: Of course, silly!
The GIFTS runs over to the passage and sprays a wad of impenetrable, gooey web over the entrance. Arancaytar puts away his bow.
Arancaytar: That's a relief.
GIFTS: You're so cute!
Dikiyoba reaches into Dikiyoba's inventory and pulls out a potion. Dikiyoba hands it to Slartucker.
Dikiyoba: This is Dikiyoba's last potion.
The GIFTS runs over.
GIFTS: You're cute!
Dikiyoba looks annoyed, but not nearly as annoyed as Slartucker.
Slartucker: This had better be a poison potion so that I don't have to put up with the GIFTS any longer.
Dikiyoba: No, it's a healing potion. At least Dikiyoba thinks it is a healing potion.
Slartucker drinks the healing potion. His cuts heal. Suddenly, Ephesos groans and sits up.
Ephesos: What's going on? Where am I?
GIFTS: Hi! You're cute!
Ephesos: Oh no! Are you what I think you are?
GIFTS: I am a Giant Intelligent Friendly Talking Spider! My name is Spider! Say, did you know that you are cute?
Ephesos: Somehow, I expected GIFTS to be somewhat larger.
GIFTS: We look larger in the games than we really are, silly.
Arancaytar: Now what do we do?
GIFTS: Are you looking for a mate? Because I am.
Arancaytar: You stay away from me.
Slartucker: Is there any other way out of this cave?
GIFTS: Sure! Follow me!
The GIFTS starts to scuttle through the cave. Slartucker, Arancaytar, Dikiyoba, and Ephesos follow. Suddenly, another GIFTS drops down from the ceiling.
GIFTS: You're cute!
Other GIFTS come out and surround the four Spiderwebbers. There must be close to a hundred of them. They all start talking in high-pitched voices. Slartucker covers his ears.
Slartucker: We're stuck in a cave with GIFTS. Could it get any worse?
On the main level, the ur-noob finally manages to pull its hand free. It looks at the passage below but sees nothing but undead below.
Ur-noob: UNDEAD! WHERE IS HE?
The multitudes of undead below shrug as one.
Ur-noob: YOU MEAN YOU LET HIM ESCAPE? ARGH!
Then the ur-noob pauses. It hears something. It puts its head close to the ground and listens carefully. It can hear many high-pitched voices and occasionally the more normal tones of a Spiderwebber. The ur-noob grins wickedly. Then it starts stomping on the ground. In the GIFTS cave, Dikiyoba looks up as the cave starts to shake and rocks dislodge from the ceiling.
Dikiyoba: Dikiyoba has a bad feeling about this...
Arancaytar: What's going on?
Ephesos: A cave quake?
The GIFTS flee in terror. They all flee in one direction, however. The four Spiderwebbers dodge aside as a chunk of ceiling collapses.
Slartucker: What will we do?
Dikiyoba: Dikiyoba thinks we should follow the GIFTS.
Arancaytar: I hate to admit it, but it's probably the best option we have.
The four Spiderwebbers run after the GIFTS. The GIFTS are all climbing up a narrow, nearly vertical escape tunnel.
Ephesos: It looks very narrow.
Another huge piece of ceiling collapses.
Arancaytar: We'll fit.
Arancaytar starts climbing. Dikiyoba follows, and then Slartucker and Ephesos. Shortly afterward, the whole ceiling of the cave collapses. The ur-noob smiles even more broadly as it looks at the rubble.
Ur-noob: THAT SHOULD TAKE CARE OF THEM!
The ur-noob then turns its attention to the ceiling. Using its hands and its fiery breath, it forms a hole large enough for it to crawl through. The ur-noob pulls itself up into the upper level of the forum. Lazarus is watching the huge group of undead blocking the forum's exit. He whirls around and pulls out his sword as he hears someone approaching.
Lazarus: Wha... oh. It's you. Hello, Infernal.
Infernal666hate: It's good to see someone else still alive. Wait... is that Demonslayer?
Lazarus: Yeah. I took it off of Zeviz's body.
Infernal666hate raises her stick.
Infernal666hate: We need to get out of here. Now. Before we are killed as well. So, should we just run in and start killing the undead and hope we make it through?
Lazarus: I was actually thinking about pretending to be undead.
Somewhere behind them, the ur-noob shrieks. Lazarus and Infernal666hate panic and run straight into the undead. The undead immediately attack. Lazarus and Infernal666hate stab at the undead with their weapons. Infernal666hate finally falls to the ground.
Infernal666hate: Oh, hell.
Infernal666hate dies. Lazarus collapses and dies soon afterward. The undead continue to claw him though, just in case he isn't really dead. The ur-noob enters the cave.
Ur-noob: GOOD! MORE DEAD SPIDERWEBBERS!
The ur-noob eats both bodies and steps towards the exit. There is a sudden snapping sound. The ur-noob lifts its foot to reveal Demonslayer, broken into three pieces. The ur-noob shrugs and exits. All the undead follow. Arancaytar, Dikiyoba, Slartucker, and Ephesos are still crawling up the tunnel. Suddenly, Arancaytar winces.
Arancaytar: Infernal666hate and Lazarus just died.
Arancaytar misses his next step and slips. He slides backwards, only stopping when his foot finds support against Dikiyoba's head.
Dikiyoba: You're hurting Dikiyoba!
Arancaytar: Sorry.
Arancaytar regains his balance and continues to climb up. Occasionally, the four Spiderwebbers can hear a high-pitched echo from above them.