Scene 2: SubTerra Forum
Scene 2: SubTerra Forum
The Silent Assassin moves quickly and silently through the noob army. Without Lenar Labs to announce his moves, few take any notice of him. The ones who do are quickly assassinated, though it isn’t immediately apparent whether their deaths are caused by blade, magic, or mental powers. The Silent Assassin carefully avoids a 1337 h4x0r and continues on his way. The Silent Assassin glances back to see more and more noobs exiting the SubTerra Forum and entering the Richard White Games Forum. The Silent Assassin steps away from another 1337 h4x0r passing by, and then kills the 1337 h4x0r from behind. Then the Silent Assassin hears the ur-noob speak.
Ur-Noob: HOW IS THE BATTLE DOING, CAPTAINS?
The Silent Assassin pulls behind a rock and covers his ears in pain. The ur-noob’s voice is a hideous high-pitched shriek.
31337 h4x0r: The noobs had some trouble passing from the SubTerra Forum into Richard White Games Forum, but that problem has been rectified, your Noobness.
Spawner: I've hired the best mercenary flamers available, your Noobness. They've already arrived and are attacking with the rest.
The Silent Assassin continues to cower. This time, the ur-noob’s voice is a low, fiery growl.
Ur-noob: GOOD! WE WILL NOT BE HELD BACK BY FERRETS, SEALS, NEEDLES, AND MORONIC CULTISTS!
31337 h4x0r: Of course, your Noobness.
Spawner: Yes, your Noobness.
Spawner and 31337 h4x0r march off. The Silent Assassin continues to hide. As he hides, he starts to think. Clearly, the ur-noob is far beyond his skill. He should flee and report to the Richard White Games Forum at once, perhaps killing many 1337 h4x0rs along the way. But that wouldn’t be very assassin-like. He should at least see what the ur-noob looks like. The Silent Assassin slowly stands up...and sees himself reflected in the enormous eye of the ur-noob. The ur-noob opens its jaws and lunges. The Silent Assassin sees huge, gleaming, serrated fangs.
Silent Assassin: Holy flaming reaperdisks!
Ur-Noob: HOW IS THE BATTLE DOING, CAPTAINS?
The Silent Assassin pulls behind a rock and covers his ears in pain. The ur-noob’s voice is a hideous high-pitched shriek.
31337 h4x0r: The noobs had some trouble passing from the SubTerra Forum into Richard White Games Forum, but that problem has been rectified, your Noobness.
Spawner: I've hired the best mercenary flamers available, your Noobness. They've already arrived and are attacking with the rest.
The Silent Assassin continues to cower. This time, the ur-noob’s voice is a low, fiery growl.
Ur-noob: GOOD! WE WILL NOT BE HELD BACK BY FERRETS, SEALS, NEEDLES, AND MORONIC CULTISTS!
31337 h4x0r: Of course, your Noobness.
Spawner: Yes, your Noobness.
Spawner and 31337 h4x0r march off. The Silent Assassin continues to hide. As he hides, he starts to think. Clearly, the ur-noob is far beyond his skill. He should flee and report to the Richard White Games Forum at once, perhaps killing many 1337 h4x0rs along the way. But that wouldn’t be very assassin-like. He should at least see what the ur-noob looks like. The Silent Assassin slowly stands up...and sees himself reflected in the enormous eye of the ur-noob. The ur-noob opens its jaws and lunges. The Silent Assassin sees huge, gleaming, serrated fangs.
Silent Assassin: Holy flaming reaperdisks!