Scene 5: General Forum

Dintiradan has slipped out of the Tech Support Forum. Now he wanders the General Forum, wondering how to turn the noob attack to his advantage. Then he remembers the lurkers. He boldly steps into the shadows. He can sense the lurkers nearby, even though he can't see or hear them.

Dintiradan: Hey, lurkers. My name is Dintiradan. I will be an evil overlord someday. You guys have the chance to be part of my Legions of Terror. What do you think?

There is silence from the lurkers.

Dintiradan: Okay, so maybe you don't. But I bet you want to go fight the noobs.

There is still silence.

Dintiradan: Don't make me set Arctic Wolf on you.

The lurkers laugh. From out of the shadows comes a quiet voice.

Lurker: Arctic Wolf only attacks the newbs. We are safe from him.

Dintiradan stomps his foot angrily.

Dintiradan: If you come out of the shadows right now and fight for the Spiderwebbers and I'll give you all... uh, bubble gum. That's right; I'll give you a lifetime supply of bubble gum. And Skittles.

The lurkers are silent again.

Dintiradan: If you don't come out of the shadows right now, I will shine a flashlight on you all! Er, I mean, I'll shine my rod of darkness-penetrating lightness on you all!

Dintiradan whips out his flashlight and turns it on.

Dintiradan: Arghhh! Oh. You look like normal people after all. Well, why do you hide in the shadows?

Lurker: It's what we are good at.

Dintiradan: Why don't you demonstrate your abilities on the battlefield?

The lurkers remain unconvinced.

Dintiradan: If you don't fight now, you will eventually be killed off by the noobs. If you do fight now, then you will probably die, but at least there's a small chance that you will live.

The lurkers look reluctant, but they finally step out of the shadows and form up in front of Dintiradan.

Dintiradan: That's the spirit! To the Avernum Trilogy Forum!

Dintiradan and the lurkers exit.