Scene 1: Exile Trilogy Forum
Scene 1: Exile Trilogy Forum
Spawner watches the noobs cleaning up the Exile Trilogy Forum for a while before turning around to face the ur-noob.
Ur-noob: I AM NOT HAPPY, SPAWNER!
Spawner: I can explain! I can explain! What do you want me to explain first, your Noobness?
Ur-noob: EXPLAIN WHY THE SPIDERWEBBERS WERE NOT CRUSHED IN THIS FORUM, IDIOT!
Spawner: Right. Well, you see, they had enough ammo to kill most of the flamers before they came anywhere close to the Spiderwebbers, your Noobness. They are highly inventive. Even after running out of arrows, they slew flamers with rocks, sticks, pens, and even raisins, your Noobness.
Ur-noob: RAISINS! I HATE RAISINS!
Spawner: Of course, your Noobness. One of the flamers, Pyroroamer, came up to me and demanded to be a captain. Seeing as how it threatened to stab me if I didn't comply, I did. Pyroroamer pulled all the flamers out of the battle and disguised them as 1337 h4x0rs. I suspect they will kill many, many Spiderwebbers in the next forum, your Noobness.
Ur-noob: VERY WELL! NOW, TELL ME ABOUT THE DEATH OF 31337 H4X0R!
Spawner: It lost its gun to a Spiderwebber and got killed trying to get it back. At least it killed the Spiderwebber in the process. I appointed a replacement captain, h4xx, and it is now starting the attack in the Avernum Trilogy, your Noobness.
The ur-noob stares at Spawner. Spawner trembles visibly.
Ur-noob: DO NOT FAIL ME AGAIN, SPAWNER! NOW GO!
Spawner salutes and runs off like a scared kitten. The ur-noob sniffs loudly and wipes a claw across its nose.
Ur-noob: NOW, WHERE IS MY FOOD?
Ur-noob: I AM NOT HAPPY, SPAWNER!
Spawner: I can explain! I can explain! What do you want me to explain first, your Noobness?
Ur-noob: EXPLAIN WHY THE SPIDERWEBBERS WERE NOT CRUSHED IN THIS FORUM, IDIOT!
Spawner: Right. Well, you see, they had enough ammo to kill most of the flamers before they came anywhere close to the Spiderwebbers, your Noobness. They are highly inventive. Even after running out of arrows, they slew flamers with rocks, sticks, pens, and even raisins, your Noobness.
Ur-noob: RAISINS! I HATE RAISINS!
Spawner: Of course, your Noobness. One of the flamers, Pyroroamer, came up to me and demanded to be a captain. Seeing as how it threatened to stab me if I didn't comply, I did. Pyroroamer pulled all the flamers out of the battle and disguised them as 1337 h4x0rs. I suspect they will kill many, many Spiderwebbers in the next forum, your Noobness.
Ur-noob: VERY WELL! NOW, TELL ME ABOUT THE DEATH OF 31337 H4X0R!
Spawner: It lost its gun to a Spiderwebber and got killed trying to get it back. At least it killed the Spiderwebber in the process. I appointed a replacement captain, h4xx, and it is now starting the attack in the Avernum Trilogy, your Noobness.
The ur-noob stares at Spawner. Spawner trembles visibly.
Ur-noob: DO NOT FAIL ME AGAIN, SPAWNER! NOW GO!
Spawner salutes and runs off like a scared kitten. The ur-noob sniffs loudly and wipes a claw across its nose.
Ur-noob: NOW, WHERE IS MY FOOD?