Scene 1: General Forum
Scene 1: General Forum
The Spiderwebbers all lounge around, doing whatever they want. Wise Man and Jumpin' Salmon are as high up as they can get, watching for Bomber and Lord Llama to reappear.
Spring: See? Isn't this much better than working?
Terror's Martyr: It still sucks.
Ben4808: I told you we should have gone to the RWG Forum to spam.
Terror's Martyr: That would suck even worse, you [censored] [censored]!
Ben4808: Hey! Don't call me that!
Mr. Bookworm looks up from the book he is reading, sighs, and resumes reading.
Terror's Martyr: I'll call you whatever I want. [Censored]!
Terror's Martyr shoves Ben4808.
Jewels: TM, no!
Ben4808 loses his balance, cracks his head against the wall, and falls unconscious to the ground.
Jewels: That wasn't nice. Now the thing will make him speak entirely in noob.
Alec: Don't be ridiculous. The thing can't attack in such a large gr...
Alec suddenly keels over.
Terror's Martyr: What the [cen...
Terror's Martyr, too, falls over unconscious. Sudden silence descends upon the forum as everyone turns to look.
Spring: But... but how?
Dareva: Does this mean the thing can strike from wherever it wants now?
Major: We're all going to die!
Major runs screaming for the exit out of the message boards, pushing people out of the way as he goes.
Delicious Vlish: Ow! You just stepped on one of my tentacles!
Major crashes into The Lurker, but keeps running.
The Lurker: Hey!
Major reaches to pull the door open, but the door is suddenly thrown wide open by someone from the other side. Major is pinned between the door and the wall. Robinator walks in boldly, followed by VCH and Meeshka.
Robinator: Hey, everyone. How's it going?
Imban: Not well.
Robinator: Has it been that boring without me? I will do my best to liven things up!
VCH: Yeah!
Imban: No, the boards are being attacked.
Robinator: And you're just standing around?! Come on, let's defend it!
Robinator picks up a sword and waves it in the air.
Robinator: Where's the attack coming from? I'll teach the thing not to attack us!
Lazarus: The thing can strike from anywhere.
Robinator: Anywhere? How can it strike from...
Robinator suddenly falls over unconscious, almost landing on his sword.
Meeshka: What just happened? Hey! There's something trying to bite my foot!
Almighty Do-er of Stuff: Oh, that's just a newly-hatched fluffy turtle. Inspector Walnut found it hiding in the fluffy turtle pit. It wants your sanity.
Meeshka: Am I supposed to give it some? Ow! That hurt!
Almighty Do-er of Stuff: Only if you want to keep that foot. Inspector Walnut! No! I'll take Robinator's sanity and give it to you. He needs his head still!
Meeshka and VCH give the baby fluffy turtle their sanities and the Almighty Do-er of Stuff gives Robinator's sanity to Inspector Walnut. Slartucker looks as though something is bothering him.
Arancaytar: What is it, Slartucker?
Slartucker: I'd like to speak with the Nine-Headed Cave Cow and get some advice. I can only do that when I am alone. But if I go anywhere alone, the thing will attack me, and then I will no longer be able to commoonicate with the Nine-Headed Cave Cow.
Arancaytar: So what are you going to do?
Slartucker: I will have to leave Spiderweb in order to speak with the Nine-Headed Cave Cow. I don't know when I'll be back. Good-bye.
Slartucker exits the message board. The door closes behind him, revealing a stunned-looking Major.
Major: Wghat ghappened? Everytghingh went black all of a sudden.
Jewels: You were hit by the door. And you must have been attacked by the thing as well.
Major: Ogh dangh.
Terror's Martyr and Alec both stand up.
Terror's Martyr: This trgmhjk sucks!
Alec opens his mouth to speak, but nothing comes out. He looks furious about it.
Spring: See? Isn't this much better than working?
Terror's Martyr: It still sucks.
Ben4808: I told you we should have gone to the RWG Forum to spam.
Terror's Martyr: That would suck even worse, you [censored] [censored]!
Ben4808: Hey! Don't call me that!
Mr. Bookworm looks up from the book he is reading, sighs, and resumes reading.
Terror's Martyr: I'll call you whatever I want. [Censored]!
Terror's Martyr shoves Ben4808.
Jewels: TM, no!
Ben4808 loses his balance, cracks his head against the wall, and falls unconscious to the ground.
Jewels: That wasn't nice. Now the thing will make him speak entirely in noob.
Alec: Don't be ridiculous. The thing can't attack in such a large gr...
Alec suddenly keels over.
Terror's Martyr: What the [cen...
Terror's Martyr, too, falls over unconscious. Sudden silence descends upon the forum as everyone turns to look.
Spring: But... but how?
Dareva: Does this mean the thing can strike from wherever it wants now?
Major: We're all going to die!
Major runs screaming for the exit out of the message boards, pushing people out of the way as he goes.
Delicious Vlish: Ow! You just stepped on one of my tentacles!
Major crashes into The Lurker, but keeps running.
The Lurker: Hey!
Major reaches to pull the door open, but the door is suddenly thrown wide open by someone from the other side. Major is pinned between the door and the wall. Robinator walks in boldly, followed by VCH and Meeshka.
Robinator: Hey, everyone. How's it going?
Imban: Not well.
Robinator: Has it been that boring without me? I will do my best to liven things up!
VCH: Yeah!
Imban: No, the boards are being attacked.
Robinator: And you're just standing around?! Come on, let's defend it!
Robinator picks up a sword and waves it in the air.
Robinator: Where's the attack coming from? I'll teach the thing not to attack us!
Lazarus: The thing can strike from anywhere.
Robinator: Anywhere? How can it strike from...
Robinator suddenly falls over unconscious, almost landing on his sword.
Meeshka: What just happened? Hey! There's something trying to bite my foot!
Almighty Do-er of Stuff: Oh, that's just a newly-hatched fluffy turtle. Inspector Walnut found it hiding in the fluffy turtle pit. It wants your sanity.
Meeshka: Am I supposed to give it some? Ow! That hurt!
Almighty Do-er of Stuff: Only if you want to keep that foot. Inspector Walnut! No! I'll take Robinator's sanity and give it to you. He needs his head still!
Meeshka and VCH give the baby fluffy turtle their sanities and the Almighty Do-er of Stuff gives Robinator's sanity to Inspector Walnut. Slartucker looks as though something is bothering him.
Arancaytar: What is it, Slartucker?
Slartucker: I'd like to speak with the Nine-Headed Cave Cow and get some advice. I can only do that when I am alone. But if I go anywhere alone, the thing will attack me, and then I will no longer be able to commoonicate with the Nine-Headed Cave Cow.
Arancaytar: So what are you going to do?
Slartucker: I will have to leave Spiderweb in order to speak with the Nine-Headed Cave Cow. I don't know when I'll be back. Good-bye.
Slartucker exits the message board. The door closes behind him, revealing a stunned-looking Major.
Major: Wghat ghappened? Everytghingh went black all of a sudden.
Jewels: You were hit by the door. And you must have been attacked by the thing as well.
Major: Ogh dangh.
Terror's Martyr and Alec both stand up.
Terror's Martyr: This trgmhjk sucks!
Alec opens his mouth to speak, but nothing comes out. He looks furious about it.